Influenced
by Phantom of Runes
Summary: With Rorek hanging around Beast Boy so much, he was bound to get influenced sooner or later! How will Raven handle someone in the process of being yet another...Beast Boy? [Crack Fic!]


**Influenced  
By: Phantom of Runes  
Rating: T  
Genre: Humor  
Pairing: Raven/Rorek if ya kinda squint...**

**Disclaimer: The T****T belong to their respective owners, as well as all other elements used to create this story.**

* * *

Raven had known that sooner or later, Beast Boy would begin to get to him.

The green changeling had a talent for that. For beginning to change even the most stubborn of people.

And that kinda pissed her off.

Even now, Beast Boy was sitting at a computer; lecturing the wizard on the wonders of YouTube. His babble floated all over the room and within seconds, Raven was on the verge of throwing her fellow team mate out a window. She wasn't sure how long his speech would go on, but she knew by the time he was done, the wizard would be more knowledgeable on the websites stars than her.

A sigh escaped Raven as she closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. All week long these kind of random babbles had been spouted on and off all over the tower, from TV shows to computer games to singers and to foods. When Robin had charged the task of helping the wizard gain knowledge of life nowadays, Beast Boy had sprung forward to help, and try and get a person to understand his views.

So basically, by the end of all this nonsense, Rorek would be a hopeless case much like the changeling.

And that also pissed her off.

She would have thought that _somebody _would have stepped forward to save him from Beast Boys clutches, but nobody had seemed to rise to take the challenge. She would have loved to show the wizard the ropes of modern life... but she had an awful habit of just freezing up in front of him.

And that was the third and final thing that made it onto her 'pissed her off' list.

The tea kettle whistled loudly behind her and Raven was snapped out of her annoyed trance. She began to grumble out of annoyance, nothing that really mattered or even made sense, but just random words that seemed to comfort her. Moving the kettle and turning off the stove, the words came out as sentences of pure gibberish.

"Vanilla...snow...blanket...magazine..." For some odd reasons, this technique had an uncanny way of calming her down just when she was about to go slug Beast Boy in the face.

But it didn't help her in the least when she remembered that he had been the one to suggest she do that. A scowl quickly built on her face as she attempted to listen to Beast Boy's lecture. She desperately hoped Rorek would still be salvageable by the time Beast Boy had finished his ridiculous speeches. She had no doubt though, that the wizard was helpless to the brainwashing. He truly had no idea of modern day, so all of this was a learning experience to him. Raven was positive that Beast Boy was influencing him.

And two Beast Boy's would cause the apocalypse.

And that would greatly disappoint many people who wanted zombies to be the cause of the apocalypse.

"...A lot of the YouTube stars are comedians, like me! Oh, check out this one video it's so funny, but also life changing!..."

The ridiculous everything was instantly shunned as Raven snorted and turned back around to kettle. No, it was absolutely no doubt that Rorek's mind was know influenced by Beast Boy.

Sometimes she wondered just how she managed to _not _strangle the idiotic changeling.

Rubbing her temple with one hand, she walked over to the counter and took a seat on a stool. She looked over at the two teens hunched over the computer screen and mentally sighed. She had wanted so badly to stop Beast Boy from spreading his conspiracies, but of course, Robin insisted that Beast Boy knew what he was doing.

Robin was a douche.

She hadn't realized that her gaze was still on the rooms other occupants until one of them turned slightly to look at her. Instantly Raven thanked whoever was listening that her hood was up to hide her blush. She hated that too. One look from Rorek and instantly every emotion in Nevermore turned into squealing fangirls.

Raven hated Rorek's fangirls with a passion. She often dreamed happily of ways to kill all the people that dared send him date requests.

He flashed her a wide smile before turning back to the computer screen, result of Beast Boy's whines that Rorek wasn't paying attention. Raven only felt her blush darkening. Yeah, he was definitely a lot better without the scarf.

She absent mindedly raised the tea cup to her lips. Thanks to the fact that she was currently very distracted, she wasn't aware of how hot her tea was until it scalded the roof of her mouth.

"Damn it!" Raven swore as she leapt to her feet and dropped the tea cup.

"Lady Raven!"

"Dude no! That's not cool!"

"What?"

"Nobody puts 'lady' in front of anything anymore. It's lame."

"Oh."

"But you can call me Mr. Wonderful."

"...Why?"

"Because that _is _cool."

"..."

"Awkward silences aren't cool either dude."

"..."

"Thanks a ton." Raven commented sourly, glaring at the two. The words came out slightly slurred from the burned injury. She only scowled deeper at that.

Beast Boy turned to her and grinned brightly. "But you helped me teach Rorek that normal people don't say 'lady' whatever."

"You're an asshole."

Beast Boy turned back to Rorek. "And I'm not an asshole, Raven's just mean sometimes."

Raven scowled at him but winced as she realized the tea had burned her hand a soft pink from when it fell. "Damn." She whispered softly.

Rorek inched closer, either to be away from the creepy changeling or to check on her. "Are you all right?"

She blushed again and turned away from him. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just burned myself a little."

Beast Boy suddenly materialized in front of her. "Rub some bacon on it!"

In all her life, Raven had never had a 'WTF' moment. She thought it was pointless to just sit there with a stupid, blank expression that just spelled clueless. But right now, Raven found herself having a major 'WTF' moment as she struggled to understand what exactly the other person meant.

"What?" She said brilliantly.

"Rub some bacon on it." Beast Boy chimed again.

"Why?"

"Just do it."

"...Just shut up."

"Come on, just try it!"

"Why the hell would I rub that stuff on my hand?"

"Because bacon fixes things!"

"Where the hell did you get that kind of logic?"

"Stop asking questions! Mr. Wonderful knows what he says!"

"... I'm not sure if I even want to know why you're calling yourself that."

"Because I'm very wonderful."

"Yeah, okay." Raven turned to Rorek. "What does he mean, rub bacon on it?"

He looked unsure, hesitance lurking in his bright blue eyes. "Supposedly bacon materializes and fixes certain ailments."

She stared at him.

Beast Boy rushed around again over to Rorek. "Or you can just like, do the water healing thingy."

"Water doesn't exactly heal Beast Boy..."

"Of course it does Rae! It glows all pretty if you can bend it!"

"...Are you all right?"

"Yeesss, now, just do something so I can stop wasting precious nuggets of wisdom on you that you won't take!"

"That made no sense."

"THEN GO TO THE INFIRMARY!"

"...I can heal it..."

"Oh yeah, you're the doctor in the house!"

A slap sounded through the room as Raven's palm connected with her forehead.

Beast Boy whispered to Rorek. "I think she's finally understanding our ways!"

Raven glared at Beast Boy. "Get out."

"What do you mean, 'get out'? I live here!"

"Get out."

"You can't make me! I'm an American citizen!"

Glare. "Now."

Maybe it was the final tone in her voice, or that her glare was getting better. Or maybe it was the Trigon eyes that flashed onto her face, but whatever the reason, Beast Boy sniffed and turned around.

"Fine, but only because I need to do something else that involves Facebook, and defriending someone's who's name starts with an 'R' and ends with an 'N'!"

"You are going to defriend Robin?"

"No!" Beast Boy spun around to glare at both Rorek and Raven. "I'm gonna defriend monster lady!" He turned back around and stormed out.

Rorek instantly tried to go after his 'mentor', but was stopped by a cold, "Don't go after him."

He turned back around, a bewildered look on his face. "Why not?"

"Because he'll only confuse you even more." With a finality in her voice, Raven turned and walked back over to the stove.

"But Beast Boy has been generous enough to teach me many things..." Rorek trailed off as Raven gave him an incredulous look.

"He hasn't been teaching you anything, Rorek. He's only been filling your head with random viral video's and such."

"Isn't that what I should be learning?"

"No."

"But I've been taught so much!"

"...Does that include rubbing bacon on wounds will supposedly heal them?"

"Yes! Isn't that wonderful?"

"(lull)"

"It's not?"

"(lull) I'm gonna kill Beast Boy..."

"...Homicide is illegal."

Raven glared at him. "So that's the one thing you've possibly learned that's useful, and it gets in my way of disposing of Beast Boy. That's just wonderful."

"Sorry?"

Raven sighed heavily and looked up at him, confusion evident in his bright blue eyes. "Don't worry about it. You just need to stop hanging out so much with Beast Boy. He's starting to influence you."

"Oh. I did doubt many of the things he told me but even still..."

"I get it. Don't worry, he's tried to convert us all."

"Ah."

Raven cast him a glance. "I can take you somewhere if you'd like to see a part of Jump City. Since pretty much everything Beast Boy's told you has been trash, I guess we'll just have to start over. You wanna come with me to town?"

Rorek practically pounced on her, hair suddenly whipping as he jumped. "Yes!"

Damn it. Another blush had appeared on Raven's face for the umpteenth time today. "Okay then-"

"Yo Rae!"

Raven suddenly felt her calm slip as she turned to snap at the changeling who was now holding a magazine quiz. "Oh, come on! Why can't you just leave me alone when I have my moments?"

"I just wanted to know...are you an emo?"

"...what?"

"Are you depressed frequently?

"Sorta..."

"Do you think many things are pointless?"

"Obviously, one of them being green and standing right in front of me."

"Ouch, that one hurt Rae. Do you wear dark colors?"

*glare*

"...I'll take that as a yes, congratulations! You're an emo!"

"Shut up."

"What's an emo?" Rorek chose that moment to pop in.

"A depressed person who cuts themselves and..."

"LADY RAVEN?! WHY MUST YOU INFLICT HARM UPON YOURSELF? I CAN HELP YOU!"

"I'm not an emo!"

"SELF PAIN IS NEVER THE ANSWER RAE!"

"I'M NOT AN EMO!"

"DONT DO THIS TO YOURSELF LADY RAVEN!"

"THIS IS POINTLESS SCREAMING!"

"SHUT IT RAE! YOUR MOM IS POINTLESS SCREAMING!"

"LIFE IS POINTLESS!"

"I KNEW YOU WERE AN EMO!"

"WHY MUST YOU HURT YOURSELF SWEET RAVEN!"

Cyborg stopped eating a turkey leg he had found in the fridge, covered in blue goop. "Rae's an emo?" He asked in disbelief.

Beast Boy nodded excitedly as his eyes flickered between a very angry Raven and the half robot teen. "Yeah, and guess what?"

"I believe the correct term is 'chicken butt'?" Starfire called from the table.

Beast Boy giggled. "You said 'butt'!"

Cyborg snapped a look at Beast Boy. "Man, did you just _giggle?_"

"NO!" Beast Boy raged. "I chuckled!"

"...What's the difference?"

"Chuckles are man giggles!"

"...So basically you did just giggle?"

"Okay, all of you just shut up!" Raven suddenly screamed. Everyone stopped to stare at the half demon who looked dangerously close to exploding. The goth snapped a look to a bewildered Rorek. "We're leaving!"

"But we need to find you help about your self inflicting pain problem!"

"NOW!" She snatched his arm and pulled him after her in tow.

Beast Boy grinned at shot two thumbs up at Rorek. "Nice man! You just scored a hottie!"

"SHUT UP BEAST BOY!"

* * *

Okay...oh wow, I really have no idea where this came from. Different jokes...friend's lines...and youtube video's all payed tribute to this. It doesn't help that I took a huge break from this once I started it, revising is a total pain!

So anyway, I guess you could call this a parody or whatever, and I honestly hope it's enough to even be _called _a funny story. So click the little review button, it'll love you forever!

.::Phantom of Runes::.


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